Buying games ≠ playing games

by | Feb 3, 2024 | Blog

Want to hear my voice read this? I contributed this segment to the Talking Tabletop Podcast Episode #3!

I know I’m not alone when I say that I don’t get to play board games as often as I would like. Between being a parent, a husband, and an employee, my hobby time feels like it’s constantly shrinking, and it’s the first thing that I choose to cut when something comes up.

My first fallback when I’m experiencing a drought of board games is Board Game Arena. Personally, I don’t really like playing with random strangers, so I never join games unless I’m invited, or it’s arranged outside the site, such as on a discord server. I don’t know why accepting an invite from someone on The Nerd Shelves Discord server is different as opposed to just joining an open table for the game I’m wanting to play, but it is.

Actually, I do know why it’s different. It’s because every time I join a random open table, I get obliterated. In both Race for the Galaxy and Tobago, I would join an open table, excited to learn a new game, only to be matched up against someone with hundreds if not thousands of games under their belt. Those experiences kind of chased me away from playing games with random strangers.

I wonder how many days it would take to play all these games, assuming we were playing games for 12 hours a day.

All that being said, Board Game Arena isn’t a long-term sustainable fix for my board game habit. Eventually, I yearn to have the physical pieces in my hands. And when I can’t play games, I start to seek ways to acquire new to me games. I constantly have to remind myself that buying games does not equal time to play games.

When I can’t play games, I sometimes feel like the only way that I can engage with the hobby that I love is by buying board games. Retail therapy is a real thing that taps into my little lizard brain and gives me a rush of happiness. Adding items to my board game bliss cart, or popping into my favourite friendly local game store, can make me feel the same happy feelings as I felt when I was last playing games with my friends. Unfortunately, these feelings aren’t an adequate replacement for the hobby that I enjoy so much. And it can even kick off a downward spiral of shame when I’m staring down a shelf full of unplayed games.

I tell myself that I get a lot of joy out of unboxing and organizing my new games. I love the feeling of punching out the cardboard tokens from their sprues, and the satisfaction of having a game perfectly organized and ready to play it. I justify my purchases by saying “I’ll play it solo!” but honestly, my solo games are few and far between.

This did not feel like joy. This felt overwhelming

What really inspired this post was when I considered my board game acquisitions over the past few months. At the end of November my partner and I had a baby, and I’ve only been out to my regular game group, like, once since he’s been born. But in that time I’ve bought, like, 12 games. 5 of them I bought used for a really good price, and 5 of them came in via a math trade, but now my shelf of shame has grown dramatically during a period where I’m just not playing many board games

I don’t even really have a conclusion for this, I have no solutions to anyone who may be suffering from the same ailment as I do. The best I can offer is to look for opportunities to engage with this hobby in ways that make you feel connected. If you lack a regular gaming group and are filling your hobby needs with consumerism, consider joining some board game discord channels or engage with your favourite board game content creators on social media. This is inherently a social hobby, and engaging with others who are equally as passionate about board games as you are creates some special bonds that can lift your spirits when life otherwise gets you down.

New (to me) games I got in Janurary’s math trade

Just be aware of the FOMO that comes when those creators go to large conventions and post their ‘haul’ pics. It’s absolutely unreasonable to go and buy 30 to 50 games at one time. If it’s not obviously disclosed in the haul pic somehow, I highly suggest asking for clarification on which games they received for free and which ones they paid for themselves. It can help dispel the illusion that buying dozens of games at one time is reasonable or sustainable.

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